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Behavior Change in 1 Simple Step!

Writer's picture: trekkingwithtaratrekkingwithtara




I wanted to quickly start off with that I am excited to announce I am officially an ACE Certified Personal Trainer. This has been something I have wanted for a while and I passed my exam this past week! (Woohoo!!!!)


However, with that certification I really feel motivated to start learning more about not only fitness and training, but what will actually get people to change their behaviors and start living healthier lives. So, I've fallen down this YouTube rabbit hole on Behavior Change recently, which has been a WEALTH of knowledge I am still trying to process.


While I dive deeper into my research, I want to share with you my findings along the way! Here we go...


Just the other day, I was listening to a YouTube video from Be Inspired while I was in the shower with Nir Eyal speaking. The video intrigued me from the start with it's flashy title "I Guarantee You're Behavior Will Change | TRY IT!" so obviously, I clicked it. I never have high hopes for videos with guarantees in the title but I'll always give it a shot! As I started listening, I was amazed with some of the things this guy was saying.


(watch video here --->>> https://youtu.be/7mw59d2bCgg )


He starts off with explaining that distraction actually comes from within us, it's actually the feeling inside us that triggers us to avoid something that is uncomfortable. Which actually goes against Freud's Pleasure Principle that the nature of human motivation is the pursuit of pleasure and avoidance of pain. So, basically if you feel hungry you eat, if you feel thirsty you drink and the same applies for psychological things too! So if you feel lonely you talk to friends online, if you're uncertain you check google, and so on. We are literally always trying to feel and be at a state of homeostasis.


Then he drops the bomb "if all human behavior is spurred by the desire to escape discomfort, that means [...], time management is pain management."


Which brings him on to a study by Timothy Wilson, where people were put in a room with nothing to do but shock themselves with a painful electric shock. About 60% of men and 20% of women shocked themselves, telling us that we are so uncomfortable doing nothing that we just want to feel something.


"This is by design; our species is designed to be perpetually perturbed. We have this instinct of feeling bored to prod us to go do something; to go search, to find better resources, to improve our lot in life. And that's not necessarily a bad thing! We can harness that, this is the same impulse that helps us develop life changing medicine, that helps us invent new things, helps us shoot for the moon.... So I don't think the answer to all of our problems is to not want, to not crave, to not desire. I think the answer is to channel these internal triggers towards traction rather than distraction.... What we're lacking is the ability to follow through. We're lacking the ability to avoid distraction." - Nir Eyal


(I don't know about you guys but I feel this urge to keep doing things so badly, it's honestly annoying... But I digress.) Nir then gets into mentioning "pseudo-work" which, for example, would be when you're at work and need to work on a project but decide to check email first. Yes, email is a responsibility but it's not what you need to do now and has become a distraction from the task at hand. (Once, again I am feeling called out by this video because I am a SERIAL pseudo-worker!..)


"We are slaves, now, to the urgent at the sacrifice of the important" -Nir Eyal


(Jeez, Nir, just calling me out left and right with your wise words...)









So.. we have figured out that we want to be comfortable and we also want to do things and we love to let less important and easier responsibilities take precedence. Which, in turn, means that we are only "addicted" to easy things because of the learned helplessness it gives us, further taking any discomfort away.


Which then, I guess this brings us to abstinence. Why don't you just stop doing the unhealthy thing? Well, because abstinence might be doable for someone addicted to drugs or alcohol but what about food or technology. You can't abstain from eating and most jobs use technology so that's out too! Telling yourself that you can't have or do something takes a ton of mental energy and is uncomfortable TOO! Which actually means, when you finally give in to the thing you were trying to avoid, your brain is being wired that pleasure happens when you give in, reinforcing the unwanted behavior.


So, does this guy ever get to HOW we can actually do something to change these unwanted behaviors and get rid of distractions?! YES, yes he does.


Nir tells us to try this thing called the "10 Minute Rule". To practice this rule, any time you have a distraction come up, tell yourself you can give in to that distraction in 10 minutes. This rule works for people because it goes off the idea of "surfing the urge" which means you are literally surfing the waves of emotions you feel when presented with a distraction (which is essentially our urge to do things). Nir tells us to set a timer for 10 minutes and literally reflect on the sensation of the distraction and talk to ourselves with compassion and curiosity instead of contempt. This literally takes away the negative and uncomfortable connotations with the distractions, allows freedom, and gives us the opportunity to reflect on the urge before acting and blaming or shaming ourselves, further reinforcing a negative cycle!


With that, I urge you to try this 10 Minute Rule in your daily life and let me know what you think! I plan to try this out in the month of September and will let you know how things go!


Nir and Be Inspired have brought a ton of useful and thoughtful information to our virtual table and I am excited to learn more! It is time we take back control of our minds and bodies and learn how to use it to build the life we always wanted!


Happy trekking!

-T



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